10 Signs Your Elderly Parent Needs Help

As your parents get older, you may notice changes in their physical, social, and emotional well-being. Subtle changes in their behaviour, habits, or environment can signal that they’re struggling to manage daily tasks. Being aware of these signs can help you become involved early and provide the necessary assistance to ensure their safety, health, and well-being. But how can you tell if their needs have changed or if they need extra help? More importantly, how can you know if their health or safety is at risk?

Here are 10 signs your elderly parents need help:

1. Changes in Personal Hygiene

One of the most overlooked signs of senior care is a decline in personal hygiene or cleanliness at home. If your parents have started neglecting their hygiene, it may be a sign that they’re finding grooming, bathing, or dressing difficult. Look for:

• Messy hair or body odour
• Wearing the same clothes repeatedly
• Neglected dental hygiene

These changes could indicate mobility issues, depression, or cognitive decline. For instance, conditions like arthritis can make daily grooming tasks painful, while depression could lead to a lack of motivation. Cognitive decline might mean they simply forget these essential tasks. Additionally, fear of slipping in the shower or difficulty with buttons and zippers could contribute to poor hygiene. Pay close attention to these changes and consider assisting them with establishing a routine or seeking professional care.

2. Unexplained Weight Loss

Sudden or significant weight loss can be a warning sign. It may result from:

• Difficulty preparing meals or lack of access to nutritious food. 
• Medical conditions such as gastrointestinal issues or dementia. 
• Loss of appetite or forgetting to eat. 

Unexplained weight loss might also be a symptom of more serious underlying health conditions, such as cancer or thyroid disorders. Social factors like eating alone may also decrease their appetite. 

Take note if their fridge contains spoiled food or if they rely on unhealthy, processed snacks due to difficulty cooking. Regularly sharing meals with them can help you gauge their eating habits. Arranging for meal delivery services or hiring a caregiver to assist with cooking can address these issues early.

3. Increased Forgetfulness

It’s normal to forget things once in a while, but if you often struggle to remember things, it could be a sign of a bigger issue. Signs include:

• Forgetting appointments or important dates. 
• Repeating the same questions or stories. 
• Misplacing items in unusual places. 

Memory issues could be a symptom of Alzheimer’s disease or another form of dementia. Additionally, forgetting to turn off appliances or lock doors can pose serious safety risks. Other behaviours to watch for include failing to recall the names of close relatives or struggling to follow a familiar recipe. 

Encourage your parents to write down reminders, use assistive technology like alarms and smart home devices, or maintain a visual calendar. If you keep forgetting things, seek a professional assessment.

4. Difficulty Managing Finances

If bills are piling up, accounts are overdrawn, or your parents are struggling to manage their finances, this could point to cognitive decline. Additionally, they might:

• Fall victim to financial scams. 
• Struggle to balance a checkbook. 
• Forget to pay recurring bills. 

Financial problems can also occur because of poor eyesight or a lack of understanding of new technology, like online banking. As your elderly parent needs help with tasks like cooking or managing finances, it’s important to offer support or find professional care. Helping them review their finances, setting up automatic payments, or simplifying their accounts can help ease the burden. If scams are a concern, consider monitoring their accounts and educating them about potential threats. Establishing a power of attorney for financial matters may also provide peace of mind.

5. Neglected Household Maintenance

A once clean and organised home that has become cluttered or messy may mean your parents are feeling overwhelmed. Look for:

• Unwashed dishes, piles of laundry, or trash buildup. 
• Broken appliances or neglected home maintenance. 
• An overall decline in cleanliness. 

This could signal physical limitations, depression, or cognitive issues. For example, a long-term illness can make it difficult to do household tasks, while stress might lead someone to ignore their duties. Regularly visiting their home can provide a clearer picture of their living conditions. Hiring a housekeeper, organising their belongings, or arranging for cleaning services may reduce the issue and restore a safer living environment.

6. Social Withdrawal

Isolation can have a significant impact on mental and physical health. Signs your parent may be withdrawing include:

• Avoiding family gatherings or social events. 
• Losing interest in hobbies or activities they once enjoyed. 
• Rarely leaving the house. 

Social withdrawal can happen because of difficulty moving, hearing problems, or feeling depressed. For example, hearing problems can make it hard to follow conversations, which may lead people to avoid social gatherings. Loneliness may worsen depression or cognitive decline.

Encourage them to stay connected by frequently visiting, inviting them to outings, or exploring local senior centres that offer group activities. If transportation is an issue, arrange rides or introduce ride-sharing services tailored for seniors.

7. Mobility Challenges

Observe your parent’s ability to move around their home safely. Signs of mobility problems include:

• Difficulty getting up from chairs or climbing stairs. 
• Unsteadiness while walking. 
• Frequent falls or injuries. 

Mobility challenges can lead to a fear of moving around, further reducing physical activity and worsening their condition. Chronic pain, weak muscles, or joint issues may be underlying causes.    

Ensure their home is equipped with safety features like grab bars, non-slip mats, and adequate lighting. Physical therapy or exercises tailored to improve strength and balance can also help.

8. Unexplained Bruises or Injuries

Frequent bruises or injuries can indicate that your parent is falling or struggling with balance. They might:

• Try to hide injuries out of embarrassment. 
• Have difficulty explaining how they occurred. 

Such injuries may also result from vision problems or medication side effects that cause dizziness. Bruises on the arms or legs might suggest they’re using furniture for support. Talk to them about their falls without judgment and consider consulting a doctor to identify the cause. Mobility aids like walkers and home modifications can greatly reduce the risk of injury. Regular vision and medication reviews may also address underlying causes.

9. Cognitive Decline

Beyond forgetfulness, other cognitive issues to watch for include:

• Confusion or disorientation in familiar environments. 
• Poor judgment or decision-making. 
• Difficulty following conversations or instructions. 

These signs may require a medical evaluation to determine the underlying cause. Cognitive decline can impact their ability to live independently, making it essential to address these issues promptly. Additional signs include difficulty understanding bills, managing medications, or responding appropriately in emergencies.

Brain-stimulating activities, a healthy diet, and consistent routines can help slow the progression. Consider introducing memory aids and creating a supportive environment to reduce stress and confusion.

10. Unusual Mood or Behavioural Changes

Changes in mood or behaviour can signal emotional or physical struggles. Pay attention to:

• Increased irritability or anger. 
• Signs of depression, such as sadness. 
• Anxiety or unusual suspicion. 

Mood changes might be linked to medication side effects, mental health issues, or dementia. For example, anxiety could result from memory gaps, leading them to believe someone is stealing from them. Approach these situations with patience and understanding, and consult a healthcare professional for support. Consider involving a counsellor or therapist to help address their emotional needs.

How to Help

If you notice any of these signs your elderly parent needs help, take a compassionate approach to address the situation. Start by having an open and respectful conversation with your parents. Encourage them to share their feelings and concerns. Depending on their needs, you may:

• Arrange for medical evaluations. 
• Hire professional caregivers. 
• Modify their home for safety. 
• Explore assisted living or senior community options. 

Regular communication and thoughtful planning can help ensure your parents receive the support they need while preserving their dignity and independence.